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Is It Too Much? - Note on Teens and Technology - England 2025

Cecilie Conrad·Aug 4, 2025

“Look who just posted!” an excited teen cries out to friends and family in a kitchen one August afternoon in South East England. Two almost complete families, three dogs, and friends from three countries joining the fun, when someone realises there is a note from a shared friend. Laughter, discussions, and inspiration follow.

What would have happened if that moment of flipping out the phone midst social time was considered to be socially unacceptable or restricted by screentime - would they have connected on something else? Maybe. But they would certainly not have connected with that friend.

Teenagers and electronics is teenagers unfolding in their social development, skills and LIFE.

Is it too much? Too much of what?

Too much obsession with likes, shares and comments? Too much energy leaving the room, discussing people outside of the immediate social field? Too fragmented social commitment?

Sometimes, but rarely, that is what I see.

More often, I see confidence, creativity, fun, self-exploration, adventures, thoughtfulness, learning journeys, and passionate commitment to connections everywhere. Are they busy with other people's lives in unhealthy ways? Most often not, no. That is not what I see.

And if they are off, if the balance is not achieved, it the use of social media IS too much, it is actually not about social media, but about being out of balance - needing something you don’t get, living under too much pressure, feeling not enough fulfilment, meaningfulnes, unconditional love, alignment, direction. Taking our children's hands, and walking with them in life, so this is their feel when they are in puberty, and they can stay there even when waters are rough, is OUR responsibility as parents and community, and it is simply too easy to blame it on a piece of technology.

Algorithm or not.


.................... a note ...................
I have swapped the original coverphoto for the selfie, as it is a better one. And more funny. the photo above, you can see how the teens are taking the selfie in the coverphoto, while posing as if they took a picture of the art. 

I had asked the teens to pose, so I could take a photo of them taking a photo. Just a few moments before they DID both take a picture of this overwhelming piece "Girl with crysantemums" by Olga Boznanska, as they ARE both quite interested in art, and on their phones can find photos of the piece. 

I am not against the selfie, I do not find in ridiculous. I love the selfie format. Finally you can make the portrait of yourself, you want - not being dependent on someone understanding how you like yourself depicted. I think it is great. Like all things electronics, like all things period, it can be done on the wrong basis and in the wrong context, this is a different discussion. In This context, the context of me trying to write about all the nuances of teenagers and smarthpones and computers, I find it just simply funny they made it into a meta-discussion as I asked them to pose for the blog. 

Or did they just chose the obviously most meaningful - to have fun in the moment, not repeating an already done with moment?


TeensPhonesArt

Unschooling and Parent consulting, conversations, blogposts, and podcasts on family life and learning

Hi, I'm Cecilie Conrad. I'm a trained psychologist, mother of four, radical unschooler and full-time traveller. I have lived with unschooling for over a decade and help other families find their own path – whether it is about homeschooling, unschooling, or the bigger question of how you want to live as a family.

I offer guidance, conversations and talks. I call my work grandmothering – not coaching in the traditional sense, but presence, professional insight and concrete help navigating motherhood and finding your way home to your own values.

Am I the right person to help you? You can book a free discovery call, and we'll talk and figure it out.

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I share my knowledge and curiosity about family life and learning in my two podcasts.

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