They can simply not cook in England | Day 217 of my 2023 Journal

Visiting Great Britain, we thought: let's visit a tearoom. Asking around, the best tearoom in the area was supposedly the PuddleDuck Tearoom. Eating lunch out would free time to play D&D all morning on a rainy day. It seemed like a good plan.

Let it be noted we have done our homework. The day before, we had been there and asked if they could serve food for vegan, gluten-free people. When they said they could, they had both food and cake for such people; we told them we would come for lunch the next day.

Oh my god!

This is my second time eating out in England. I will not do it again.

Ever.

It is one thing. They did not have anything for us. At least they tried and wanted to make something. I had to share with the cook that bulgur is not gluten-free, and I had to suggest there would be vegetables included in the plan.

Repeating: I had to suggest vegetables. For vegans!

What they could do was baked beans on GF toast. So far, so good. Not our favorite British dish, as the luxury of toasted bread is ruined when you put something wet on them. Plus - would they chill with the sugar?! Anyway. This is a classic, and it was edible.

When the vegan wraps arrived, I shit you not: Cold bread just out of the bag around a combination of vegan mayonnaise and vegan cheese.
And nothing else.

Remember I suggested vegetables?

The side salad was okay, just out of the bags I call cheating salad from the super (but that’s okay; it can be eaten). Not much to it: Salad and a tomato for all of us to share. Large enough to be filling for ONE of the wraps.

I am not even going to share what my non-vegan friends were served. Just sharing, the homemade cakes were dry and without any taste except sugar.

Conclusion: I give up. If I go out to eat again in this country, it will be Indian or Asian, not traditional English food.

The tea was good. I will give them that. And the experience was right down the stereotype of England, next to the rain we have had for 15 consecutive days.

And I did enjoy the D&D very much. It was almost worth it.

Love and light

Cecilie Conrad

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